Stranded in Tuamotus

GUYS GUYS GUYS

WARDOG SURVIVED A TRIBAL COUNCIL

Hold your applause please please

Today I’m thankful for the giant ad on Smogon that said
“HAVE HERPES?” For a “fem clear” product.

Between this and youtube trying to sell me dolls like I’m a small female child...

The advertisers really get me, now.

Pussies are the target audience for Smogon after all

It is a soup opera indeed, apparently word of me trying to get Eddies idol has made the rounds, no reason to deny it, dunno why my allies would blame me for trying to take the idol away from the actual crazy person.

Into the hands of another crazy person of course but, ah, lets ignore that for a moment.

1-Talk to us about your swap tribe. Who are you excited to see? Who were you upset to lose?

Hmmm, well, on paper, this is great. More Returnees than newbies, I still have Stephanie AND Jessica, alongside Missy I do feel a litte awkward here tho. Not happy to still see Eddie, not super enthused about any of the newbies off of first impressions. I miss Stephannie. I miss Tai as someone I had ammunition on.

2-Talk us through tribal tonight. What was your ultimate reason for your vote?

Man, I wanted the idol gone. Plain and simple, and if we had stayed in that tribe, Garrett was so hated he was a weird shield for me. Im not happy with how the revote turned out even though I did sort of push Garrett off a cliff nice and early. He didn't help himself, by any account.

3-Now that the tribes are mixed, are you planning on staying strong with your original tribe? or do you think it's time for you to find new allies?

Hm, well, I'm open to anything. I wouldn't be opposed to getting rid of Jed but the others I swapped with (with the exception of Eddie) I feel a pretty strong bond too, oh, and also exclude Elizabeth too, she is nothing special, at least not yet.

4-What are your thoughts on the partner twist? How do you plan to utilize your cross tribal communication?

I like Shamar! He seems quite bright, and I appreciate that. I think we can get along quite well, I see no reason me and him can't do well together in this game. I think of the newbies I have met he is far and away the standout, I think I lucked out.

Man, how is Mulaney on of Hope's favorite comedians, and she works in college alumni outreach, and she never saw the bit of standup he did on that? In one of his three huge netflix specials? Sus.

I feel like she just google his name and saw he was in rehab and like acted like she knew him.

Although if thats true, huge props.

I’m so bad at reading social cues I think. This Brandon Eddie vote seems legit but what happens after that? And after that?

Our tribe is so fucked on this challenge

LOL LOOK AT THISSS

the last time it was this bad they were throwing to get me out...

Oh no...

I swear to fucking god if they threw a challenge AGAIN to get me out I'm gonna flip.

Paumotu

I can not begin to tell you how much I am shaking. Found half an idol, SAW MISSY IN THE IDOL ROOM

And my name is in the mix and there's an idol out there. I'm fucking SHOOK I feel like I know what Steph talks about with nervous nausea

I FUCKING LIVED


I LIVED

I FUCKING LIVED

I genuinely think if I ever made it on the real show I would drop dead.


My heart was pounding and I was flushed over THIS. The real thing? This is the closest

I have fucked up so much this round.

I feel bad for Shamar having a partner like me. I assumed Missy had made it into the idol room because it showed her as "viewing" it so I rushed to tell everyone so that they wouldn't hear from her first. Turns out she allegedly hadn't cracked it.

And then I accidentally said "till Shamar finds it" to Steph.

I didn't want to tell Steph my partner jesus christ I'm so fucking stupid.

And then apparently they can still get in? I don't know, it doesn't make sense to me.

Poor Shamar I probably just fucked him over in a bunch of ways.