[Jeff Probst]

This is Alexis's Final Tribal Council Thread.

All other Jurors should remain in their own threads. Final 3, remember... this is not for you to address each other, but to talk to Alexis. In-fighting amongst the Final 3 should be reserved for the Live Final Tribal Council on Sunday.

Alexis, you have until Saturday at 8c/9e to post your statements/questions to the Final 3. Remember not to take up too much of their time as they have 10 other jurors to get to. Please no listing or questions requiring novels for answers. You should post all of your statements/questions in your opening post in this thread. There is a live Final Council on Sunday where you will get to address everyone live about the statements they have made as well ask follow-ups.

[Alexis]

Matt, Michael, and Sherri--

First of all, I just want to congratulate all three of you for making it here! This was a really tough season and I know it took a lot to get where you guys are, so no matter what the outcome for each of you, I hope you’re really proud. None of you were “goats” and I’m so happy this is a competitive FTC--I think it’s what this season deserves.

Second, I’ve struggled to think of what I really wanted to ask here. This turned out to be MUCH longer than I initially anticipated, and originally I didn’t even know if I’d ask a question. I didn’t want to ask a question that was about me, because I always find it annoying when FTC questions focus around the juror who is asking and not the finalists (though I recognize these questions often serve as closure for the jurors, which I guess is what is about to happen here haha), so I wanted to avoid that and ask you all a question that sets you up for success and let’s you all talk about your holistic games more. I’ll do that, but following reading your opening statements, Michael and Matt, I would regret not using this space to tell you both how I’m feeling, because I can’t really seem to shake it, and I want to feel good about who I ultimately vote for here.

I feel like I had pretty good insight into Michael’s game, and Michael, your OS basically aligned with what I knew, so I didn’t have a lot of questions upon reading it. However, after reading it in conjunction with Matt’s, I started to have this kind of...bad feeling about my own game and my relationships with the two of you. I genuinely thought I had strong connections with both of you day one, like more than anyone else on our original tribe, yet reading your statements side by side, I was left feeling like I was just a pawn in your games (more so after Matt’s than Michael’s, but still).

Matt, I’m going to be honest--I feel especially used by you. I know that by signing up for these games, we open ourselves up to be manipulated and played, but after coming to the jury and talking to others, I just feel like I was just another person you were sweet talking to get far and that nothing about our relationship was real. Did you ever actually intend to work with me? You cited me not whispering to you as me revealing that you weren’t a priority for me--it was quite the opposite. I didn’t want to draw attention to the fact that I had a stronger relationship with you than people suspected, but I own up to the fact that I should have handled this better. I guess I’m just hurt that it seems like you saw me as totally disposable after I put a lot of trust in you. You telling me you’d never vote me out the game was completely unnecessary and I’m left with a sour taste in my mouth now.

I don’t really know what I’m trying to articulate here, but with regards to Mike--I don’t know. I feel like I saw you as my partner in crime the entire game (with the exception of that round Aurora left, which I think you have an idea about if your head that isn’t consistent with reality and do not have a full understanding of what actually happened then, though I’m not sure if any of us totally do), but I felt like we mended things after that one lapse, and I did appreciate your loyalty on my way out. What isn’t sitting right with me is this being left with this feeling like everything we did as a duo was just leaked to Matt all game, and that you and Matt were just these two schemers behind the scenes playing everyone else, including me, who I thought was a part of a trio with you two. Was that a ruse, too? I always thought the Kissing Booth was real and I was waiting for the moment in merge that I’d get to take on the game with both of you.

Neither of you have to respond to this, but you’re welcome to if you’d like. I just wanted to try and articulate a bit of how I’m feeling, because to be honest, I’m having a hard time identifying why it’s all leaving me feeling dejected and invalidating what I thought was my reality during the game. I like playing ORGs first and foremost to meet new people, so feeling like some of the personal relationships I built were a lie is an emotion that isn’t sitting comfortably with me. But please just answer honestly. I have a pretty strong bullshit detector.

And Sherri, don’t worry--I’m not ignoring you here! I just don’t really have any grievances I want to air towards you at this mini Festivus I’m celebrating. I think you played a stellar game, but one I know a lot less about beyond you being an absolute force--an idol-finding badass who always treated everyone with respect and won a bunch of crucial immunities. I don’t feel like you played a game that “used” people, and I admire how you’ve handled yourself and other people throughout.


So the question I have for all three of you is: in one sentence (one for each finalist) can you sum up why you deserve to beat the other two people in this FTC with you?

And also, Michael, why did you use your sexuality as a weapon?


But really, thanks again to the three of you for a great season! Despite the emotional wall of text I just vomited onto the page, I really have enjoyed playing with the three of you, and I’m happy to see three very deserving finalists sitting here, who I believe reflect just how competitive this season was. Good luck!




Alexis

[Michael]

I don’t really know what I’m trying to articulate here, but with regards to Mike--I don’t know. I feel like I saw you as my partner in crime the entire game (with the exception of that round Aurora left, which I think you have an idea about if your head that isn’t consistent with reality and do not have a full understanding of what actually happened then, though I’m not sure if any of us totally do), but I felt like we mended things after that one lapse, and I did appreciate your loyalty on my way out. What isn’t sitting right with me is this being left with this feeling like everything we did as a duo was just leaked to Matt all game, and that you and Matt were just these two schemers behind the scenes playing everyone else, including me, who I thought was a part of a trio with you two. Was that a ruse, too? I always thought the Kissing Booth was real and I was waiting for the moment in merge that I’d get to take on the game with both of you.

Alexis, I really want to start out with saying that you were always my number one or my number two up to the Aurora vote. To me, The Kissing Booth was always real to me and those moves I made against Rocker and Elizabeth were very genuine in trying to lower your target and protect you. You're currently unable to read my confessionals, but a huge theme in my confessionals is me talking about my future with you and Matt and how I would deal with it. Matt knew I always took you more seriously as a friend and ally than he did and I think it's where one of our biggest disagreements would come from- how genuine you were to us. I always felt like you liked me and I had a place with you (minus the Aurora vote) but I was never sure where I actually stood with you because everyone always seemed to think you were their best friend.


early merge I never really mapped out the end game completely, because that's always a bit silly since it's so unpredictable, but I always knew I wanted you to go to the endgame with me, at least final four and I didn't mind going to the end with you, even if it would have been to the detriment of my own game because I thought you and I were very genuine with each other.


The day of the Aurora vote really hurt me though. The things that you said about me to Matt and Hope(which I found out after you were voted out) made me feel terrible. I felt like you never actually cared about our friendship or The Kissing Booth and honestly I felt the most betrayed by you. I knew Aurora was leaving that night, but I voted you because you were the one who hurt me the most. It was an emotional and symbolic vote for me.


At no point (minus the Aurora vote) was I faking my friendship or feelings towards you. I never used you. I was rooting for you to win that immunity challenge the night you were voted out because I wanted you to stay. When it was down to you and Steph, I wanted you to win. Not just because you were someone who was on my side, but because you were my friend.


But what I want you to take away from this part is that I always took The Kissing Booth seriously and if there was a way for me to stop the vote on you, I would have done that because you were my friend and I felt the genuine remorse and reconciliation over the Aurora vote from both of us. But I was stuck in a situation where it would have been impossible to change the vote, and telling you would only lead me to me being brought down as well. After the game, you're someone who I'm confident that I'll try and stay in touch with, we can talk about butts n guts, kidney stones, and shit talk Brad. Hell, maybe we can make some lamingtons together as well.

So the question I have for all three of you is: in one sentence (one for each finalist) can you sum up why you deserve to beat the other two people in this FTC with you?

Sherri: I deserve to beat Sherri because I played a stronger and more strategic game than her, being able to fall to the bottom at nine and working myself back up to the final three is not an easy thing to do when your being targeted by someone almost every round.

Matt: I deserve to beat Matt because I played the extroverted version of his game, being able to openly wheel and deal with people and having people see the moves I made through out the game is inherently more risky but it serves as my receipts at the end of the game.

And also, Michael, why did you use your sexuality as a weapon?

Because you need to work with the tools God gave you

[Alexis]

Thanks for this, Michael.

I do just want to say I'm really sorry I hurt you. You'll realize from reading my confessionals that based on things people were filling my ear with + some of the things you said in our conversations contributed to a growing distrust I had of you from the first round of merge and onward. I do think paranoia got the best of me in this case and had an impact on my game as a whole. I got very confused early in the merge about where we stood, and I had a huge guard up/major trust issues generally. But one of my biggest regrets is questioning you.

When you're reading my confessional, just know that most of what I talked about was all strategy. I didn't bring up my personal feelings for you much, because like you, I always knew we'd stay friends after this and my personal feelings for you never changed, just how I felt from a game perspective. To hear that Matt decided to talk shit about me after I was already out is actually very disappointing to hear and I really don't understand what he hoped to accomplish in doing so. I'm not sure what he and Hope told you I said about you, but I don't have recollection of saying anything bad other than I thought you were getting too confident and I didn't trust you, which was very true at the time--I never had ill feelings towards you as a person and if I did say anything, it was probably because I felt hurt at the time as if I was being played (but again, I can't recall anything).

[Sherri]

Hey hey Alexis! It's okay that you didn't give me several paragraphs...I guess that's a great thing in this situation! Thank you for the appreciation of my game, that's definitely how I wanted to play things, always with respect and a good attitude. I guess that leads into my answers to your question as well.

Michael - He severely undervalued the act of jury management - telling too many unnecessary lies, burning many bridges and leading people on far too much.

Matt - Despite playing the game alongside him, I was the one who was building better relationships, winning more challenges and finding more idols...all with the threat status on my back!

I don't have too much more to add since I haven't needed to respond to as much, but please let me know if you have more questions during that live FTC period! In the meantime...

[Matt]

Hi Alexis, I first want to apologize for how I treated you in this game. I totally understand that you felt used by me. It sounds like we mismanaged each other because I genuinely felt used by you during the Pink 3.0 and merge rounds of the game. I'm hoping to use this statement to clarify my position and how I interpreted your game actions. I'm not hoping to bullshit you at all as I don't like hearing that you're left feeling negative personally.

Matt, I’m going to be honest--I feel especially used by you. I know that by signing up for these games, we open ourselves up to be manipulated and played, but after coming to the jury and talking to others, I just feel like I was just another person you were sweet talking to get far and that nothing about our relationship was real. Did you ever actually intend to work with me? You cited me not whispering to you as me revealing that you weren’t a priority for me--it was quite the opposite. I didn’t want to draw attention to the fact that I had a stronger relationship with you than people suspected, but I own up to the fact that I should have handled this better. I guess I’m just hurt that it seems like you saw me as totally disposable after I put a lot of trust in you. You telling me you’d never vote me out the game was completely unnecessary and I’m left with a sour taste in my mouth now.
I really appreciate this opportunity because it seems like we both jumped to a lot of conclusions. Early in the game, Michael and I made a do-or-die agreement and he said he would work more closely with you and I would work more closely with Sherri. This is the lens from which I viewed the game. I expected me, you, and Michael to go farther than we did (along with Sherri). All of our personal conversations were real on my part and I really enjoyed getting to know you. I felt for you when you were going through things and I would think about you as a friend when we were off the screen, which is what I think is a good indicator of sincerity (at least on my part). I also appreciated how you asked me questions about myself and really made a genuine effort. I had a lot of fun talking to you.

In terms of the game, I felt pretty bummed on Pink 3.0 when it seemed like you had sparked some rumors about me working with Missy closely about the Jed vote. I held you in really high regard after Michael (at the same trust level as Sherri) and it just seemed like you kind of threw me under the bus a bit without full information. I decided to not do the same to you when I had the opportunity because I genuinely wanted to work with you. The round you went to TC pre-merge on Green 3.0, I had been told Missy was gonna leave and Missy told me the vote was between you and Shamar. Rather than tell her that she was a big name and have her scramble or something, I was grateful to actually have the opportunity to protect you in any small way (and Shamar, but more you) and so I said nothing. Not that what I did would've made a huge difference probably but I think that shows I really wanted to work with you. When we talked at merge about what had happened, and through Elizabeth pre-merge, I also let it go. I didn't want it to affect things moving forward.

Come to the merge and I felt good about my relationship with you, and felt great about Michael. I intended to stick with you but I got sketched out after the F11 vote. At this time we were having a discussion and you said the F11 were your favorite people in the game. That struck me as scary and contributed to my building perception of you as royalty in the game, the tribe princess who was destined to win by the Stranded monarchy. That's the analogy I had. I did not think of you negatively in a personal sense and our personal conversations continued to be very real to me. In any event, at the F11 I believe I was so conflicted about you after seeing your position and I told you I would never vote you out. I actually meant it in the moment but was also kind of wanting to see your response and you said something like I appreciate it but I'm not going to hold you to this because I know it's a game. That reaction to my comment hurt and definitely made me more passive with you from a game perspective. Whereas I trusted Michael to be my ride or die, based on your feedback, I didn't think you would be. And so that's when I stopped intending to work with you until the end game. I understand I had many agreements with other players, and so did a lot of the cast, but those agreements were formed in the rounds after we had had that snippet of conversation, pretty much based on how it went.

The next few rounds were rough for me because I saw how much power you had and I felt conflicted personally about going against you. I was a gamebot with my decisions but I'm a person behind the screen too and it felt gross. I'd also like to mention that people like Sherri using the throw up emoji is kind of ironic. Sherri and I had this Stranded neighborhood fanfic and she talked about putting on a nice bake sale and being sweet so the players left, including you, would like her. I understand this is about me and not about Sherri or Michael, and I'm not trying to divert blame, but the righteousness is a bit much and hopefully you detect the bullshit from all players. I also understand that your relationship with me was probably closer to your relationship with people like Sherri so I'm not trying to excuse my behavior.

I don’t really know what I’m trying to articulate here, but with regards to Mike--I don’t know. I feel like I saw you as my partner in crime the entire game (with the exception of that round Aurora left, which I think you have an idea about if your head that isn’t consistent with reality and do not have a full understanding of what actually happened then, though I’m not sure if any of us totally do), but I felt like we mended things after that one lapse, and I did appreciate your loyalty on my way out. What isn’t sitting right with me is this being left with this feeling like everything we did as a duo was just leaked to Matt all game, and that you and Matt were just these two schemers behind the scenes playing everyone else, including me, who I thought was a part of a trio with you two. Was that a ruse, too? I always thought the Kissing Booth was real and I was waiting for the moment in merge that I’d get to take on the game with both of you.
Neither of you have to respond to this, but you’re welcome to if you’d like. I just wanted to try and articulate a bit of how I’m feeling, because to be honest, I’m having a hard time identifying why it’s all leaving me feeling dejected and invalidating what I thought was my reality during the game. I like playing ORGs first and foremost to meet new people, so feeling like some of the personal relationships I built were a lie is an emotion that isn’t sitting comfortably with me. But please just answer honestly. I have a pretty strong bullshit detector.
The Kissing Booth wasn't a ruse to me. I was a little sketched that it wasn't used for multiple rounds by you and Michael come the merge though. I get it, there were a lot of players, but it just continued to contribute to this narrative about you being best friends with everyone and me not being important (this was me making a lot of assumptions). And while I continued to talk game with Michael in the early merge you and I kind of kept things on the social side. So then when you came back a few rounds later saying you were using the Booth more it came off as more convenient than genuine to me. I understand that you probably assumed we were good and so you didn't put as much work in or feel like you didn't need to, and I conveyed as much, but it definitely sketched me out a bit. It seemed like you had a lot of deals and I wasn't convinced I was at the top. I think we both mismanaged but you're the juror in the driver seat and clearly I made a big error in judgment here. To me our personal relationship wasn't a lie at all. I really want to be friends after the game though I didn't treat you like a friend in the context of the game. If the way I played the game is too much then I definitely understand.

To hear that Matt decided to talk shit about me after I was already out is actually very disappointing to hear and I really don't understand what he hoped to accomplish in doing so.
I wanted to address this follow up. I sent Michael snippets of conversations with you where you kind of made snide comments about him and told me you didn't trust him as much. And he sent me snippets of conversations with you where you kind of made snide comments about me and told him I was constantly talking about taking certain people out but didn't. This struck me as odd because for the majority of the early merge we didn't talk much game at all and it felt like you were just writing me off without talking to me. Again this is just my perception, clearly not based in reality completely. I don't remember talking shit about you after you were booted besides saying you were a big threat and then later saying I'm sure you were directing the jury conversations.

I'm not sure what he and Hope told you I said about you, but I don't have recollection of saying anything bad other than I thought you were getting too confident and I didn't trust you, which was very true at the time--I never had ill feelings towards you as a person and if I did say anything.
That is what I said by way of copy/pasting conversation snippets. But to see it get blown up into "Matt talking shit" kind of goes along with my perception that you and others have been assuming things about me without clarifying (and this is bidirectional clearly based on how I assumed things about you too). So I appreciate the opportunity for clarity.

So the question I have for all three of you is: in one sentence (one for each finalist) can you sum up why you deserve to beat the other two people in this FTC with you?
Michael: I deserve to beat Michael because he didn't set himself up in a position where he was directing votes rather than reacting to them after the early merge.

Sherri: I deserve to beat Sherri because I managed my visibility better, had more options than she did, and could play the game with more people if she got voted out vs. vice versa.